One thing in Vegas

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If you ever go to Las Vegas, please promise me that you’ll go see the Beatles LOVE Cirque show. I cheated and snuck this picture. I seriously thought I was going to get in trouble, but at this point in the show, the ushers were actually holding onto the fabric that you see in this picture. The whole bottom half of the audience is under there. It was pure magic. Also, note the wire-artist floating in the left hand corner. Looks creepy, but was so cool!

Seriously, though. If you are a Beatles fan at all, this show is worth the money. It will touch your soul. (Hippy AF, right?)

It will, though.

 

You must.

If you’re happy and you know it…

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Current obsessions:

  • LuLaRoe leggings
  • Letter flashcards with Roman
  • Brewing loose-leaf tea
  • My essential oils (#addict)
  • Trying to figure out Snapchat (I’m too old for this shit!)
  • Watching Daisy of Love again on Hulu (so bad that its good)
  • Trying to find out which flooring we want to re-do the house with (So expensive! Gah)
  • Teddy’s giant “bongo belly” and how soft it is
  • Kissing Dustin on those liiiips
  • Finishing up the last little bits before I launch my DIY company
  • Trying to keep my protein intake in-range (I have Chronic Kidney Disease – score!)
  • When Teddy busts out in dance
  • Every time I pick Roman up from Preschool and he’s so happy to see me. Am I really that cool? Makes me feel super loved
  • Driving Dustin’s car… he got a Ford Edge and its fancy AF
  • My haircolor. #lagoon
  • A Disneyland trip with my girl. September, hurry the hell up
  • Thinking about all that I’m going to do once I get my robot leg
  • Farmer’s Market starts next weekend. PUMPED
  • Setting up my office. Decorating and shit. Whoop!
  • Rosemary crackers, applesauce cups and thick-ass steaks
  • Also crab. All the crab

 

What are you loving?  Shhaaarrreee.

 

 

The Boy Who Lived

Two years ago yesterday, Teddy was born.

The Boy was lifted from the womb that carried him for 34 weeks, his torn water bag and all. He inhaled and exhaled for the first time in the presence of his parents, our amazing surgery and Neonatal staff and also my friend Stephanie Haller, owner of Ahava Studios who was documenting his birth. Noises unheard until that exact moment in time left his tiny lips and filled the room with relief, until the relief turned into panic and our perfect, tiny Boy was quickly moved into the NICU for emergency measures. Dustin and Steph H. were sent with The Boy, while my Daddy, Teddy’s Grandpa Jeep stayed with me, his own baby girl, now a shell. She felt simply like the place that grew The Boy and now The Boy had left her. Mission complete.

The Boy was in the NICU for six weeks, the first of which we were told he would not live more than once.

His second day of life, two years ago today, was the worst day in my entire life.

We said goodbye to Him more than once. My Daddy prayed over and blessed The Boy just in case his breaths were numbered. Just in case His tiny lungs couldn’t handle living. Just in case it was the end.

While he was in the NICU those many weeks, I often thought of songs that Dustin and I loved while The Boy was in the NICU. Words that were dear to us.

Be here now, no other place to be
All the doubts that linger, just set them free
And let good things happen
And let the future come into each moment
Like a rising sun

Then The Boy decided that He really could relate to the words that Mason Jennings sang.

Sun comes up and we start again

Each day, The Boy, our son, would wake up and start again, a little stronger than the day before!

Oh, The Boy proved the truth in those words. He became the standard for what we call a miracle in our family.

He proved that sometimes, just sometimes, good things happen. That the sun can rise and bring light to darkness, illuminate the doubt that once clung to every crevice.

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Today started with the neonatologist coming in and telling us that Teddy’s condition is declining and we might want to call our family. That his lungs are under developed and they are doing everything they can. Do you want us to switch vent so you can hold as he goes? Do you want us to revive him if his heart can’t handle everything and stops?

And then it was, he’s doing a LITTLE better, but it still doesn’t look good. He is “critically ill” and we are going to see how to today goes. They will come and get us if we need to rush in and say good bye and hold him for the first and last time.

Today is for broken hearts ‪#‎teddyinthenicu

  • – January 4th, 2014

and then….


Teddy is The Boy Who Lived
(From last year by Ahava Studios. )

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January 4th, 2016.

Goodbye

New Years Eve, 2015.

I’m sitting here, gluten-free chicken nuggets (I like the crispy rice  on them!) and green beans baking in the oven + me coughing like a sweet little baby seal. My boys – Roman, Teddy and my love Dustin – are at our friend’s birthday party, repping Team Clark while I keep my germs in our own house.

Enter my end-of-year reflective post.

2015 was a great year for us! Many people had a rough one, so I am even more thankful than usual for our lovely 365 days on this Earth.

I thought I’d share some pictures with ya’ll of what’s happened since my last post in AUGUST (good lord, woman), just to catch you up!

 

And that concludes 2015.

I’ll spare you a farewell picture of me and my tender, red nose. Just pretend I look hot. And that I have pants on.  ;D

My boys should be back home any minute with a delicious piece of birthday cake for this Momma. Straight to bed for the runts and Netflix (and chill!) for Dustin and I.

We welcome you warmly, 2016!

We are so excited to see what you’ll bring us.
Let’s get our Hustle & Grow on!

#BOOM

Albuquerque… Not Alba-turkey.

I meant to post this two weeks ago we got back from our family trip to Albuquerque, New Mexico to visit Dustin’s Dad’s family, BUT, we had to pack up and head to Lake Tahoe for a family reunion on my side last week, so I didn’t get this posted when I had planned. Yes, that is a total first-world problem and I am so, so thankful to have things like two awesome vacations in a row be considered a problem, even if I am only referring to my blogging schedule. 🙂


We celebrated Dustin’s and Grandpa Clark’s birthdays (same birthday, 49 years apart!) and got to see a bunch of the Clark gang that we hadn’t seen since our wedding (11 years ago). We flew out of Oakland and we were lucky enough to share the same flight with my MIL and FIL (hi guys!), so we had extra hands with the boys. Teddy refused to nap the whole flight there, so it was intense, but we managed. He also decided to veto his afternoon naps for the most part while we were out there, so that was intense, too. I tried to convince Roman that it was pronounce Alba-Turkey, but he was too smart for me! We had an awesome rental car and got way too many iced coffees. It was hot, but it was a nice dry heat, so my lung was a happy camper!  For the most part, we had an absolute blast and would love to go back again sometime. 

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Dinosaur bones.

Stink bugs, giant ants and beetles, oh my!

Roman fell in love with Great Grandma Clark and had an electric attraction to his kind-of cousin Kaden.

A remote stealing Teddy lookin’ all beat up.

Chick  Fil-A.

Starbucks mugs.

Free breakfasts and dinners out, and perfect, crunchy ice at the hotel.

A red dirt desert that was especially green, but never ending.

Shootin’ guns and sitting on the back of a big deisel truck.

Green peppers on everything.

Too much wine on the plane, but peppermint and White Angelica E.O.s to the rescue. (Thank God. *urrp*)

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Home.

Home on the range.

You have a piece of my heart, New Mexico.

Hello, Darling.

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So, yeah. Welcome back, babycakes!

I’ve moved from my Typepad home base because I wasn’t satisfied with their service and their mobile blogging app was SERIOUSLY lacking. Momma doesn’t have time for that! I need easy.

I’ve missed blogging so much! Now that Teddy is about 18 months and pretty independent, I have the time to actually do it! Glorious time! I keep going back and forth between loving my freedom and experience extreme ovary twitches every time a friend has a baby. They’re so small! And so cuddle! And loooooovvvvveee me!

But then I remember this and snap out of it:

crybaby baby

xoxo
Steph